


all men get what they deserve.

by orphan_account



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/F, F/M, Jason-Centric, M/M, Post-Canon, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-23 06:22:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13184184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: so who the hell then threw this curve?Eight months, two days, two hours, since Whizzer died. Four months, two weeks, one day, ten hours since Marvin died.Jason was angry, and reasonably so.





	all men get what they deserve.

**Author's Note:**

> cw for mentions of suicide attempt, swearing, and talking abou death
> 
> takes place after whizzer and marvin's funeral

Eight months, two days, two hours, since Whizzer died. Four months, two weeks, one day, ten hours since Marvin died.   
  
Jason was angry, and reasonably so.   
  
Everything was okay. His parents, Trina and Mendel and Marvin and Whizzer were all okay. Trina and Marvin hardly fought anymore, only about Jason's Bar Mitzvah. A Bar Mitzvah he was going to have, just to get it over with and make his parents happy. But it was okay that he was having a stupid Bar Mitzvah. It was okay, because his dad was nicer and Whizzer was around and his mom was satisfied and Mendel was happy.   
  
Then Whizzer died, and it all went to shit. Nobody cared if Jason swore anymore. Before, Marvin would scold him and ask him where he learned such words, while Whizzer tried to hide his laughter. Jason would then point at Whizzer, causing the man to laugh even harder.   
  
After Whizzer died, the world grew dull. The lesbians from next door used to come around to Marvin and Whizzer's apartment every other Thursday night, the two couples drinking and laughing. They started coming around less and less, their visits growing more infrequent. Whenever they did come over, it was quiet. Instead of drinking to remember, they would drink to forget.   
  
The playful smirk Marvin would have whenever he was with Whizzer disappeared. Jason tried everything he could to get his father to smile like that again. His attempts were useless.   
  
Even Trina and Mendel, who were never really fond of Whizzer, lost some of their spark. Trina, who would yell to Marvin on how much she hated Whizzer, cried at his funeral. She cried at her funeral, on the way home, and for the weeks following. Despite being a therapist, Mendel was awful at helping people deal with grief, especially when it came to himself.   
  
Then there was Jason. He didn't let anyone see him cry. During Whizzer's funeral, he excused himself in the middle of the service, spending the rest of the funeral sobbing in the restroom.   
  
The only person that saw him cry was his dad. He came into the restroom once. Marvin's eyes were bloodshot and swollen, sunken in like he hasn't slept in days, which he hadn't. Jason froze, tears still streaming down his face.   
  
Neither of them had never been any good with words, so they simply didn't say anything. Jason just fell into his father's arms, both of their cried echoing in the tiny restroom.   
  
Whizzer was his best friend, Jason thought that night as he looked through the baseball cards Whizzer had given him,  and maybe, if things had gone a little differently, Jason thought, he would have considered him a father.   
  
Jason's biggest regret was never calling him dad.   
  
Around four months later, Marvin died. Another victim of the mysterious disease Whizzer had died of.   
  
Jason wasn't sure how much pain and grief he could handle in his life, and he was only thirteen.   
  
Jason was emotionless at his dad's funeral. Everyone seemed to be numb. Jason figured that people could only handle so much pain before they break. He, and his entire family, had reached that breaking point.   
  
Jason remembered how much he despised his father, and how even the thought of being like him repulsed him, and Jason hated himself for it. He hated himself for ever hating his father. Marvin was gone, and Jason could never tell him that he never meant it.   
  
Charlotte didn't come to Marvin's funeral. When Mendel asked Cordelia where she was, all Cordelia could manage was a forced, plastic smile and an unintelligible excuse for her lover.   
  
Trina, despite not being very fond of Marvin, and especially not Whizzer, tried to kill herself three days after Marvin's funeral. Jason was home alone a lot while mother was in the hospital. Mendel was always either at work, or at the hospital, checking up on Trina.   
  
Jason wanted to be mad at his mom for trying to kill herself. She knew that they had all already lost Marvin and Whizzer, why would she want to add to everyone's pain? Jason didn't have enough room in his grieving heart to be mad anymore.   
  
All he had room for was grief and pain. He'd lost two, almost three, parents in around a six month period. All Jason could do was grieve, and hurt. 

  
  
The sound of the front door opening interrupted Jason's thoughts. He was sitting on the couch, his head resting on his hand. He blinked his eyes open. He hadn't gotten much sleep the last few weeks, too busy worrying about Trina and her safety and Mendel.   
  
Mendel's arm was around Trina's waist, timidly leading her inside. He whispered something in her ear that Jason couldn't hear.   
  
Jason perked up at seeing his mom, but immediately deflated at seeing her state. Her face was void of any emotions. Her skin was sickly pale, the area around her eyes and cheeks dark.   
  
"Trina, dear, look," Mendel said gently, "it's Jason."   
  
Trina blinked her glazed over eyes a few times, before focusing her gaze on Jason. She smiled, the first real smile Jason had seen in months.   
  
Leaving her husband's grasp, Trina made her way over to Jason, wrapping her arms around him tightly. She whispered a quiet "I'm sorry, Jason" and Jason only held his mother closer, not wanting to ever let go.   


  
It'd been a week since Trina had gotten home from the hospital. Mendel was taking so much time off work to stay home and make sure Trina was okay. He was scared what would happen if Jason left for school and he left for work and Trina was home alone.   
  
The pain wasn't going away, but it was getting easier to deal with as every day passed.   
  
Trina was getting better, or at least from what Jason could tell. If Jason could ignore the lost look in everyone's eyes, the constant silence that filled the house, the body wrecking sobs that left his mouth every other night, and the hole in the wall from Jason slamming his bedroom door shut after Marvin's funeral, Jason could maybe pretend that everything was normal.   
  
Some days, he fell back into the routine he had before Whizzer and Marvin died. On the occasional Thursday night, Jason would think without really thinking, that he should go to bed soon, he was going to his dad's place early the next morning.   
  
Within seconds, realization dawned on him. He'd pull his suitcase out of his closet, the one specifically for going to his dad's place, and throw it to the ground. He'd kick it, over and over, biting his bottom lip to prevent his parents from hearing any shouts that might get out.   
  
Jason was angry. He was angry at Whizzer and Marvin for leaving. He was angry at Trina for not being strong enough. He was mad at Mendel for not being able to help anyone, not even himself. He was angry at Cordelia and Charlotte for never coming around anymore. Most importantly, he was mad at himself. Jason was mad at himself for letting himself love Marvin, and Whizzer. At the same time, he was mad that he didn't love them enough.   
  
He kicked the suitcase until it was slammed up against the wall and his foot hurt more than his heart.   
  
Jason collapsed onto his bed, clutching his pillow and biting back tears until he fell asleep.   
  
The next morning, Jason woke up feeling something strange and similar to determination.   
  
He pulled on his shoes and grabbed his backpack. He left his room, greeted by the sight of Trina and Mendel sitting together at the kitchen table. They each had a book in their hands. Jason could see Trina's eyes moving across the page, and he could see Mendel mouthing words as he read along.   
  
It was nice to see his parents together, neither of them obviously hurting.   
  
"Hey," Jason said, regretting interrupting their peaceful moment, "Can I go to a friend's house?"   
  
Trina and Mendel looked up from their books simultaneously.   
  
"Be back before five, okay?"   
  
Jason nodded.   
  
"Do you need any money for the subway?" Mendel asked.   
  
"No, it's alright. I'll walk."   
  
"Alright," Trina frowned, "stay safe. Call if anything happens."   
  
"I know, I will," Jason said, already on his way out the front door.   
  
Despite their worry, Trina and Mendel were used to Jason going out by himself, walking to his friend's homes. For two years, he'd walk to Whizzer's house at least once every couple weeks. Of course, they didn't know it was Whizzer's house..   
  
Jason made his way down the route Trina would take him every Friday morning for almost three years now.   
  
Within less than twenty minutes, Jason stood in front of an apartment building. The same building that Marvin and Whizzer lived in.   
  
He swallowed thickly, trying to push back any emotions. Jason wasn't here to mourn.   
  
Jason climbed the same stairs he'd climb every weekend, counting the floors as he did so.   
  
One, two, three, four, five, six, and seven.   
  
Apartment number 701, 702, 703, 703.... Jason stopped in front of apartment number 734. He bit his lip, not dwelling on the fact that somebody else was already living there. That would be a thought for another day.   
  
Jason rang the doorbell on apartment 735. He patiently stood in front of the door, listening for any noises coming from inside.   
  
The door swung open. "H- Jason!" Cordelia pulled Jason inside, hugging the boy tightly.   
  
"Oh Jason, how have you been?"   
  
"I've been... okay, I guess." Jason managed to shrug his shoulders, despite the lesbian's tight grasp.   
  
"I'm sorry Char and I haven't been coming 'round much," Cordelia pulled away from Jason to nervously wring her hands, "it's been.. Hard. You know... God, especially for you..."   
  
"Mom tried to kill herself," Jason blurted out.   
  
"What?" Cordelia's eyes grew as large as saucers.   
  
"My mom... She tried to kill herself a couple of weeks ago...."   
  
"Oh my god, Jason, I'm so sorry! We should've been there.. Is Trina okay?"   
  
"Yeah, yeah.. She's getting better, I think."   
  
Cordelia hugged Jason again, and Jason let himself focus on being surrounded by the smell of burned food and flowers.   
  
Jason sat across from Cordelia, a mug of hot chocolate in each of their hands. They were sitting at an old, small table, perfect for two.   
  
Jason took a sip from his mug. The hot chocolate was both watery and powdery. Jason took another sip, wondering how she could mess up the simplest of drinks. He was surprised to say he missed Cordelia's awful cooking.   
  
"Why didn't Doc come to dad's funeral?"   
  
Cordelia stared into her mug. "Charlotte regrets not coming.. She felt guilty. She blamed herself for their death, I think. Like, it was her fault they couldn't save them, y'know?"   
  
Jason nodded.   
  
"She missed seein' you around though, we both did. You're a good kid, Jason. You're so much like your father."

“Everyone says that..”

“Because it's true.”

“I used to hate my dad.”

Cordelia tilted her head, waiting for Jason to explain.

“He left my mom and I, and still expected everything to be the same. He was mean, not just to Mom, but to everyone. He.. He even hit Mom once… And for a long time, he didn't even care! I hated it when people said I was like him, because I hated him. But I don't think I ever really _hated_ him. I guess I was just scared to be like him. I didn't want to be like him.”

Cordelia was a good listener, not saying anything until Jason was done.  And when Jason was done venting, Cordelia hummed in thought.

“It sounds like somebody could use some mousse.”

Cordelia went into the kitchen, coming back with a bowl for Jason. She set it down in front of him.

‘“It's raspberry chocolate mousse. I made some for Charlotte last night. It's her favorite. It was also-”

“Whizzer’s favorite,” Cordelia and Jason said at the same time.

Cordelia smiled as Jason took a bite of the mousse. It was surprisingly good.

 

“Is Charlotte at work?”

‘'Yeah,” Cordelia nodded,” she's been working a lot these last couple months. It keeps her mind busy, I suppose. I do the same thing. I’ve been making so much food to keep myself busy, we had to buy another freezer to keep it fresh,” Cordelia laughed shakily.

“I also keep making food, trying to make Charlotte happy. You won't believe how much raspberry mousse I’ve made these few months. It's not fixing anything, but I don't know else to do.” Cordelia stared into her, now cold, hot chocolate. “Sorry, you don't want to hear about a grown woman’s grief-”

“It's okay,” Jason interrupted. “You listened to me, so I’ll listen to you.”

“You're so young, you shouldn't have to worry about any of this..”.

“I don't think I can feel any older than I already feel. Besides, I kinda get what you're saying, Cordelia. I’ve been trying to help my mom and dad- Mendel, I mean- but I feel like there’s nothing I can do to help them. By the way, this is really good mousse.

Cordelia smiled at Jason, and for the first time in months, Jason smiled back.

**Author's Note:**

> can yall believe i wrote something ???? and its over 700 words??? ur boy died but now hes back and better than ever


End file.
